


Secrets and Doubt

by potterheadtributewarden



Series: Artemis Cousland [3]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Doubt, Emotional Conflict, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Doubt, Tags Are Hard, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-16
Updated: 2017-11-03
Packaged: 2018-12-30 10:24:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12106668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/potterheadtributewarden/pseuds/potterheadtributewarden
Summary: Alistair's hiding something. Artemis is worried. Set about 2 months after my other story "The Warden Returns".





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoy this work, all comments (and criticisms) are welcome and appreciated. :)

Artemis woke to an empty bed.

Still half asleep; the Queen of Ferelden pushed herself up to look behind her, pulling the sheets around her chest.

There was no light coming in from the balcony and no candles were lit; Alistair’s side of the bed was still warm. Opening her bedside draw and lighting a candle with one of the matches she kept there, she looked around the room, making a mental checklist.

Door slightly open

Both their bed clothes at the end of the bed/on the floor

Wardrobe door open

_Wait… open? The bedroom door as well?_

_Did he go somewhere?_

_The guards would have woken me if he was taken. Unless?_

No. she could hear the night watch walking outside.

Feeling herself drifting off, she lay down in bed, mind racing.

 

 

There’s an arm around her.

She wakes fully this time, turns in bed to see Alistair back in bed.

He blinks and, seeing her awake, kisses her forehead and tells her “Morning.” She can feel him smiling.

“Al? Artemis pulls away, causing her husband’s brow to crease in confusion, “did you go somewhere last night?”

He blinked quickly, “N-no. I was here the whole time.”

“Oh. I could have sworn that the closet was open a bit, and the door.”

“N-nope. Right here, whole night, definitely. Must have been a dream.”

Considering for a moment, she sees his cheeks flush, along with his ears. _Is he lying… to me?_

“Yeah, I guess. Sorry,” She leant her head on his chest, hiding her frown.

Alistair kissed her head again; “We should get some more sleep.”


	2. Chapter 2

Artemis hadn’t forgotten last night, or that Alistair was lying to her, but she had to act like she had. _“A Cousland always does their duty”_ her father said, and her duty as Queen was to help the King rule, not matter what doubts she had about her husband.

 

Despite their sharing a desk, despite sitting next to each other at meals and on their paired thrones, even sleeping in the same bed, she had never felt further from him. Surrounded by people and she felt alone.

 

Artemis heard a knock on the door.

“My Queen.”

“enter,” she was busy with a reply to the Inquisition, something explaining why she and the king would be sending Teagan as an emissary, instead of going personally.

“A letter from Teyrn Cousland, Majesty.”

“Thank you, just on my desk please.”

“Yes, Majesty.” The messenger put the letter where directed and left.

Sighing, Artemis signs the letter and puts it aside for Alistair to add his signature when he finishes with Teagan.

Opening the letter from Fergus, she thinks back to when she last saw him in person.

Hugs and laughter, her niece Eleanor refusing to let go of her legs, Maribelle, her brother’s wife, hugging her, glad that she returned safely, shedding tears with her brother, his in relief that he didn’t lose her again.

_Alistair seemed happy too. Was that a lie as well? I’m even doubting my memories now…_

The letter was simple, a reply to an invitation for “The Aniversary of the Wedding of King Alistair and Queen Artemis Theirin.” A long title for one day.

_He’s coming on his own, then. Poor Elle, I remember dragon pox. Knocks you over completely. Should I tell him? No, he’d just accuse Alistair out right, besides, I don’t even know how I’d say it._

“Temi?” came Alistair’s voice from outside the door, “You still in here?”

“I am.”

The sandy haired king entered the study, smiling, “How’s the letter coming, love?”

“I’ve just finished, all it needs is you’re signature and then it can be sent,” he stood behind her chair and kissed her head, “Fergus will be here on his own in a few days, Elle has dragon pox.”

“Poor her,” now his forehead was on the top of her head, “since that’s all done, do you fancy a walk in the gardens?”

“No, it’s late, I might turn in.”

Artemis stood and walked out of the study, not looking at her confused and hurt husband.


	3. Chapter 3

“… and then we got sat on by a druffalo.”

“hmm. Wait, what did you say Teagan?” the king’s head flew up to look at the Arl.

“I was trying to see if you were listening Alistair, you’ve been distracted the past few days,” Teagan walked towards the king and leaned on the desk, “is something bothering you?”

_Should I tell him? He might think it’s stupid…_

“It’s Temi, she’s been avoiding me,” Alistair sighed, “I think I’ve upset her, but I don’t know how…”

“Perhaps she’s unwell?”

“No, she would have said. I hate this, feeling like I’ve upset her.”

“You mentioned that she woke up while you were out, perhaps she realised you were lying.”

“I… shit, she probably thinks I’ve done something. Maker,” he put his head in his hands, “what have I done?”

There came a knock on the door.

“Enter,” Alistair called.

A guard came in bowed and said, “the Teyrn Cousland has arrived and is waiting in the throne room, Majesty.”

“Tell him I’m on my way, and inform the Queen.”

“Yes Majesty,” the guard bowed again and left.

“I just hope I can explain to Fergus. Perhaps he can stop Temi killing me…”

“One can only hope Alistair.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the shortness, will try and make the next chapter longer, but I've been busy with revision.


	4. Chapter 4

“Fergus! It’s good to see you.”

“and you Alistair,” the Teyrn and the King clapped each other on the back. Given how casual they were, one might have found it hard to believe they were the two most powerful men in Thedas, but one ruled the country and the other was only out ranked by the royal family.

“Fergus, I need to discuss something with you in private, and I hope you can help me with a problem I have.”

Fergus looked confused at his brother-in-law’s request, but agreed readily, as he considered the other family, almost as soon as they met.

“I’ll meet you tonight, in the gardens,” Alistair continued, “But keep this between us, at least until I’ve spoken to you.”

“I swear it, brother.”

“Her Majesty, Queen Artemis Cousland-Theirin,” a herald announced.

“Really Marcus,” the Artemis commented, “you don’t need to do that every time, especially when it’s just my brother and the King in here.”

_That’s odd,_ Fergus thought, _Temi calling Alistair ‘the King’, usually it’s his first name or ‘my husband’. Have they had a fight or something?_

“Fergus!” Artemis greeted him with a hug, “It’s good to see you again,” her face was buried in his shoulder, but he knew she wasn’t smiling, it felt like a frown.

Now Fergus was worried.

 

 

That night, Artemis, again, woke up alone, the bed still warm where Alistair had gotten up moments before.

 

“Fergus?”

“I’m here Alistair,” the noble replied.

They met under a cherry tree, planted there years ago, as a wedding present for Artemis.  Somehow it seemed appropriate.

“What’s wrong with Arti, Alistair? I know my sister, I can tell something’s wrong.” Fergus glared at the king, daring him so make excuses.

“I told you about the present that I’m planning for our anniversary?”

“Yes?”

“Well, I snuck out to see how they were coming along, but she must have woken up and seen me gone. When I came back she woke up again and asked where I was, I told her I was there the whole time.”

“She didn’t believe you, I take it,” the Teyrn smirked, one eyebrow flicking up.

Alistair sighed, “No, I can’t lie anyway, but especially not to her.”

“We’ll figure something out, Al. We’re a stubborn breed us Cousland men.”

“If Temi is anything to go by Cousland women are too. Say, do you mind looking at what I told you about, make sure they’re right?”

“Of course, I’d be glad to.”

Fergus bade the king goodnight, leaving to think on what he had been told.


	5. Chapter 5

Fergus lay down in his bed, having finished letter to be sent to Highever. He hadn’t included anything about the… _argument, discourse? What would you even call it?_ … between Alistair and Artemis, it wasn’t his place to spread it beyond the castle walls.

He had been to see the progress on what Alistair asked him to see, it really was amazing, the level of detail brought out from just a small stimulus and a few badly described memories.

_Incredible, especially when it’s Arti who’s better at describing people…_

He sighed, “Maker,” the Teyrn murmured to himself, “I hope I can help them soon. They don’t deserve the heartache, either of them…”

 

 

A knock on his door pulled him out of his thoughts.

“Your lordship?”

“Come in.”

“His-his Majesty asked me t-to d-d-d-d,” the poor boy looked nervous as he stammered through the message.

“Calm down, lad. Try again,” Fergus gently told him, trying to put him at ease.

“His Majesty asked me to deliver this at night. That it wa-was urgent.”

Fergus nodded and took the note, “Thank you,” smiling, he waited until the boy, because there was no thinking he was old enough to be a man, had left to read the missive.

 

Fergus,

I’m showing Temi the surprise, I can’t keep lying to her. It’s just hurting us both. I just hope I can convince her to come with me.

Alistair.

 

_I guess it did need to happen eventually, I hope it’s not too late._


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> almost finished, the next chapter will be the last, hope you enjoyed it, comments are always wanted and appreciated. :)

“Artemis… can I talk to you a moment?” Alistair hesitantly asked his wife.

She looked up from her book, “Of course, my lord.”

Her addressing him like that struck his core, but he ignored it for now, else he couldn’t go through with this.

“I… I know things have been, stained, I guess for the last few days. And, I want to fix it.”

“You don’t ned to apologize, my lord. Many nobles do it, I should not be so…”

“No, Temi. I’m not, I... I could never do what I think you think I did.”

She looks at his eyes for the first time since he entered, her hazel orbs full of surprise and gladness; but there was still some mistrust, “Then, what do you mean?”

“Please, come with me and I’ll show you.”

“I… I don’t…” she took a step back.

Alistair stepped closer, slowly presenting his hand to her, as if to ask her to dance, but there was no music, and neither royal smiled.

“If you ever trusted me with your heart, if you ever believed that I love you, please, Artemis, come with me, let me show you what I’ve been hiding.”

Her hand lifted, tempted to trust him, as she had for over a decade, then it lowered before her eyes caught his again, hazel meeting amber, and she saw the fear she recognized from so many years ago.

 

 

 

 

 

                “ _Temi! Temi, no, don’t leave me. Please wake up.”_

_Magic flows through her body, healing her. Her eyes open to see a blur with red-blond hair._

_“Alistair?” his eyes betray his fear_

_He holds her close, whispers “thank you, I, I can’t lose you love.”_

_“you won’t have to,” She tells him, “I’m not leaving you, Al. I’m right here with you.”_

 

 

 

 

“I’m right here with you,” Artemis replies, sliding her hand into his, causing a grin to flash on his face.


	7. Chapter 7

They were portraits.

Alistair had taken her to a storage room, empty save for a long something covered by a pure white tarp.

“Wait here,” he had let go of her hand and walked over to the tarp.

He pulled it away and Artemis gasped.

“Al…” tears pricked at her eyes, “They’re beautiful.”

Identical portraits, done in fine detail, lifelike, stood against the wall. Artemis gazed on them and her parents looked back.

“How, how did you manage to do this?” she looked at her husband, “Almost all portraits were destroyed when…” she choked on the words, the memory still hurt.

“Fergus helped,” Alistair admitted, “he found some pictures hidden in the Cousland treasury, and he provided the artist with more detailed descriptions, too. That’s part of why he came so early, to make sure these were accurate.”

Artemis flung her arms around the king, “I love you,” she told him, before kissing him fiercely. Pulling back, she asked, “but why are there two?”

“One is an anniversary gift for you, but I needed to thank Fergus for his help, so I had the second one commissioned for him,” Alistair rested his forehead on her shoulder, “I’m glad you like them. This is the only reason I left our bed. To check the progress on these and to tell Fergus about what was happening with us.”

“He definitely knew something was off.”

“Happy anniversary, Temi.”

She kissed him, “Happy anniversary Al.”


End file.
